Day 3...and what a day it was. I know some of you might be a little shocked by this next post, but honestly, I haven't lost my mind...I promise! So for awhile now I have wanted to get a tattoo. Again I know how this sounds, like some sort of rebellious act, I promise you it is not that at all. So when I found out that Michelle was for sure coming down to visit me, I knew I had to seize the moment and just do it, after all she is the only one I would ever want to do this with. I mean we have been friends for 19 years...wow that makes me feel old. We have had a lot of firsts, the first time I drove solo, I drove to her house, we graduated 6th, 8th, and 12th grade together. We have seen each other through a lot. So that afternoon we went to
OC Tattoo.
Michelle got three small symbols on her left wrist...a cross (for her faith), the roman numeral V (for the 5 members of her family), and a star (she needed one more to balance it out ;) )
I got a treble cleff with Psalm 33:3-4 written underneath it on the upper back part of my neck. Now let me explain myself before you all start freaking out. For those of you who know me well, you know that I have had a pretty rough year. This rough year has led me to do a lot of praying and more importantly a lot of listening to what God wants to teach me through these many trials. As many of you know, I have my bachelors degree in music, what many of you don't know is that I chose music over journalism (I was a double major) after a pretty awesome encounter with God.
I was in church, feeling so much inner turmoil because I knew I needed to drop one of my majors, otherwise I was going to be in school for about 8 years. I had no idea which one to drop, journalism at the time was practical, and my parents were strong advocates of that, while music was a risk. This moment in church was the first time that I distinctly heard God's voice and he said..."Kristin, trust me with your music". That day I came home and wrote my first song, funny thing is, I had been trying to write for years and couldn't, the minutes I released control and had faith in God and his calling on my life it came so naturally, as if God spoke directly through me in song. It was so special.
While at APU I went full throttle with my music, I honed my craft and wrote a lot of songs. And then I graduated. Not only did i get a degree upon completion, but also a massive amount of fear, binding fear. I stopped doing music, I stopped writing, I stopped singing, I stopped playing the piano, I hid everything that I wrote in a notebook and tucked it away, basically I stopped trusting God completely. Instead I put my faith and trust in myself and what was safe and easy. I got a job in advertising, it was a cool job, I worked on entertainment accounts like CBS and Showtime. Cool parties, cool people, awesome job...I hated it, every minute of it. I felt like a part of my soul was dying, and I dint know why.
So I quit and got a job teaching music, I started playing the piano again, but I still didn't sing, I didn't write, I kept that notebook locked up. A few months back I was praying and asking God to pretty much change my life, because I know that I am not where I am supposed to be. He showed my that I have been Jonah for the past 3 years, running as hard as I can from anything that he has called me to do. RUNNING. And more importantly that not only have I not trusted Him with my music, but I have not been trusting Him with my life, instead I have been trusting myself...no wonder I am so stressed out all the time. :)
In the Old Testament when God would show himself to his people they would build an altar to remind them of what God had done for them. The first altar Abraham built was an altar that resulted from an encounter with God Genesis 12:7, “Then the Lord appeared to Abram and said, ‘To your descendants I will give this land.’ And there he built an altar to the Lord, who had appeared to him.” Well, this tattoo is my alter. It is my constant reminder that I have made a decision to not only trust Him, but to believe Him as well, with all of me, to "trust him with my music".
Psalm 33:3-4 "Sing to Him a new song; play skillfully and shout for joy. For the word of the Lord is right and true; he is faithful in all he does."
And what is it that you do after you get tattoos...Well of course you get Jamba Juice and thin mint girl scout cookies. After that we went and checked out Balboa Island, which is SO cute. That was my first time there, and I will definitely go back again soon. It is only 20 minutes from where I live. So fun!
I know this is really LONG post...so thanks for reading! :)
